Heimskr’s High Horse Special – Nekrogoblikon

This is a special edition of Heimskr’s High Horse where, due to no news worthy information, we discuss something completely random and obscure. You can also find the traditional Cogwheels of Tamriel Foundry below which includes the second episode of After Dark and a continuation of the After Hours club.


For the first ever special edition of Heimskr’s High Horse, we will absorb the musical genius of the band Nekrogoblikon. Some people refer to them as symphonic folk metal, but it’s far easier to call this genre goblin metal. Goblin metal is a sub-genre, in my opinion, of glory metal which is defined as:

A synonym for the sub-genre of heavy metal rock known as power metal. Near distortionless, extremely melodic rifts, and fast beat make a glory metal song. However, true glory metal is often referring to Tolkienesque settings, involving Dragons, Elves, heroes, etc. Also known as, troll metal, epic metal, and fantasy metal. Most people that listen to Glory Metal consider it more of a guilty pleasure then a favored genre.

Basically, goblin metal is glory metal – with goblins. At this point, assuming you’re still reading, I’m sure you’re asking “Byronyk, what the hell is wrong with you? You know it’s 4/21 right? This music is shit because JB and Taylor Swift are my favs #yolo#swag.” If you are one of these people, I’m sure you are like Brad in the No One Survives music video. Don’t be Brad. As a side note, the girl in the video is Kayden Kross, an actual porn star. You’re welcome.

Kayden Kross

Now to the actual dissection of the song, No One Survives by Nekrogoblikon. There are a few deep seeded themes in this piece; however the primary focus is regarding psychosocial interactions within the work place (as defined by psychologist Erik Erikson). The story follows a misfit boy (goblin) who works in a cliché office environment who likes a pretty girl. Every time the goblin attempts to become more then friends with this girl, Brad steps in and ruins everything. This story is not exactly original, but displays a dichotomy between two personality types vying for the affection of a girl.

I believe the introduction and ending of this song is attempting to have the listener understand the human condition. The writers of this song not only use reductive logic to presume violent human nature, but more interestingly is their presumption of inherent love transcending environment (fantasy adventure land vs. office). Being one who doesn’t believe in universal truths or divine command theory, I fully support this position.


If I was a better writer, I’d write for the Onion.

The Cogwheels of Tamriel Foundry – After Hours

After Dark: Ep. 2 – Chicks man!

Blade, Felord, and Felyx are back in their second episode of After Dark, an Elder Scrolls Online podcast. This week, I found out the official Tamriel Foundry Teamspeak has spies in it. The hosts of After Dark believe the spy is from Zenimax, but I’m pretty sure the only spy would be Thalmor stealing the secrets from the one true god; Talos.

After Hours Club

The After Hours Club is a special section in Heimskr’s High Horse to look over the most popular, the most controversial, and the most insightful community topics of the week. This week we have three threads that are sure to satisfy your curiosity or feed the fires of internet barbarism.

  1. The popular thread of the week goes to @Lorelai and his thread discussing the news that there will no longer be DLC for Skyrim. Personally, I’m fine with this. Considering the volume of content in Skyrim and their current DLC’s, I would rather have Bethesda work on a new title then work on a game that can easily draw 1000+ hours out of your life.
  2. This week’s insightful post of the week goes to @Gaen and his post on the topic of optimal tank choices – Dragonknights or Templars. I think this is far too early to have this kind of discussion even after playing both classes myself. I would say that class labels in ESO are easily ignored due to weapon and armor perk homogenization. The only true differences are your class abilities and even then they can be ( in my opinion) flavor choices rather than min/maxing choices.
  3. The infamous controversial post of the week goes hands down to @Eventide and the Leaked Gameplay Footage – NO NDA VIOLATIONS thread. I classify most of the people in this thread as two kinds of people – 1) Doomsayers and obnoxious skeptics 2) Rabid fan boys defending a leaked video based on “how they feel”. I would recommend going to read this thread if for no other reason than the lols.


I hope you enjoyed Heimskr’s High Horse. Next week already has some great information waiting to be posted, so come back, stay awhile, and listen.

25 responses to “Heimskr’s High Horse Special – Nekrogoblikon”

  1. Profile Photo


    Total Posts: 438


    I apologize in advance.

    You will learn… No king rules forever. Only death is eternal.


  2. Profile Photo


    Total Posts: 622

    Nord Dragonknight

    Blood Of The North

    So, got bored this weekend @Byronyk?  :P And get that resume going for the Onion!

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    Total Posts: 289

    Khajiit Nightblade


    I have a new hero. F*** you Brad.

  4. Member Avatar


    Total Posts: 14

    Altmer Templar

    A great news article makes you think and do your own research into the subject.

    I am certain most people will stop reading one paragraph after the music video and do some quick external research and come back

    Et si ostendo non jacto

  5. Profile Photo
    Boromir WolfsBane


    Total Posts: 214

    Nord Templar


    Ok that was a little weird ha ha ha :) first i am reading next thing i see is a weird green goblin granted in the beginning i was checking out the girl the most so can’t complain ha ha ha :) decent read



  6. Profile Photo


    Total Posts: 439


    I need hallucinogens, this reality is not tolerable.

    But nevertheless thank you for creating content in such a slow week.

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    Total Posts: 4235

    Khajiit Templar

    @Byronyk – This is the single best article ever written on Tamriel Foundry, if not any news outlet ever.  This type of content is exactly why Al Gore invented the internet, and I’m sure you’ve done him proud with this.

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    Total Posts: 1827

    Altmer Sorcerer

    @byronyk, how drunk were you?

    awesome, article, yet still no horse.

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    Total Posts: 81

    Imperial Templar

    Haahahaha. Badass. I listen to basically any and every type of music, especially metal, so I actually enjoyed that video, even more so because Kayden Kross was in it.

  10. Profile Photo
    Vladimyr Angelos


    Total Posts: 39

    Dunmer Dragonknight


    Hilarious, a fantastic read! Thanks for that Byronyk, a little unexpected, but overly-appreciated none the less :)



  11. Member Avatar


    Total Posts: 785

    Are goblins a playable race in ESO!?

  12. Profile Photo


    Total Posts: 438


    Hwrath-Gro-Khash said on April 22, 2013 :

    Are goblins a playable race in ESO!?

    I can confirm that yes, there are Goblins in ESO (just not playable). In the PAX press event, one of the quests was to kill a goblin king and take his crown. Plenty of goblins were slaughtered getting to the king.

    You will learn… No king rules forever. Only death is eternal.


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    Total Posts: 32

    Altmer Sorcerer


    Good to know there’s other Metal listeners on here!!! Thank you for introducing me to this band!


  14. Profile Photo
    Svarl of Arlestheim


    Total Posts: 202

    Nord Templar

    Ebonheart Metalworker’s Union

    I’m sorry, did no one else notice that Brad’s head was completely gone?!? Really?! No one comments on the fact that his head was ripped 100% apart and splattered EVERYWHERE?! Maybe it was just me….

     Guildmaster of the Ebonheart Metalworker’s Union

    ’’Ultimate excellence lies not in winning every battle, but in defeating the Enemy without ever fighting’’ The Art of War, Sun Tzu

    ’Secundum Verbum Tuum’ According to thy word.

    ’’It is not those who can inflict the most, But those who can endure the most, who will triumph’’ – Irish Freedom Fighter

  15. Profile Photo


    Total Posts: 211

    Nord Templar

    Wings of Fate

    What is it they teach kids?

    “If you don’t have anything nice to say don’t say anything at all.” I think you should have stuck with that quote…..

  16. Profile Photo
    Boromir WolfsBane


    Total Posts: 214

    Nord Templar


    it was really out there but at least there was something to read this week so good job :)



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    Total Posts: 25

    Dunmer Sorcerer

    Knights of the Pact

    good read a little more odd then the rest but yet it gave the people of tamrielfoundry something to read so good job :)

    OH sorry didn’t mean to kill you I didn’t see you there.

    Join the Ravenguard if you are in the Pact do you think you can handle the awesomeness?  :)

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    Total Posts: 44

    Bosmer Nightblade

    Great read, Serious lolz there, can’t wait for the next one :)

    Join The Order of Aeternus! We are a kind and friendly RP guild!

    ~Visit our site take a look around if you like it then stay a while and maybe even join our ranks~


  19. Profile Photo
    Umaril the Unfeathered


    Total Posts: 3414

    Altmer Sorcerer

    Ah, the NDA thread…

    Regardless of the lack of official news updates to talk about regarding TESO, excellent article @Byronyk!

    *Formerly known by the username ”GarlasMalatar”*

    ”What is better? To be born good, or to overcome your evil nature through great effort?”Paarthurnax

    ”Shanta, ehlno.  Tyavoy balangua!” ~ Umaril the Unfeathered

    ”Welcome, Nerevar. Together we shall speak for the Law and the Land and shall drive the mongrel dogs of the Empire from Morrowind.” ~ Dagoth Ur

  20. Member Avatar


    Total Posts: 247

    Nord Dragonknight

    Wow, I just noticed I won this week’s Insighful thread! Thanks.


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