Heimskr’s High Horse – A La Cuisine!

Man, I can’t believe I’ve been writing Heimskr’s High Horse for a full month now. I’m excited to continue writing this weekly feature and look forward to actual information *cough cough*. Don’t be disheartened though, this week we got some goodies like Iron Chef Zenimax and a contest give-a-way of Morrowind!

Development – What you need to know!

…In the Words of my Grandfather… A La Cuisine!

Oh my god, who the hell is ready for a leg of lamb, a flagon of mead, and finish all that diet-crushing food off with a god damn sweet roll?! This guy! Zenimax just announced their official Food Truck Tour of 2013!

This March, The Elder Scrolls Online food truck embarks on an adventure across the US. If you happen to be in the states, meet us at one of the 11 stops for free food, giveaways, and more! If you can’t make it, keep an eye on our website as we’ll announce our plans for the European conventions soon.

Now if you follow that link above, you can see the locations and times of each truck stop. As someone going to the second stop (PAX East), I’m damn excited! Now let’s calm down, put down your Hawaiian roll thinking it’s a sweet roll, and let’s have a chat. Many people have said on our forums that the food truck idea is “stupid”, “boring”, and “..a waste of advertising monies.” If you look at the truck stops, you’ll notice almost all of them are university locations. Who are at universities you ask? 18-24 year old men who are more than happy to take free food and play video games. Considering the total cost of gas and food costs, the benefits far out way the risks.

As a side note, if any of you are considering going to PAX, sign into this thread!

One Million Likes – Horses and Armor

Thanks to you, the fans, the ESO Facebook page just hit 1,000,000 likes! For our reward, Zenimax gave us two great gifts. First, they gave us a video featuring mages and horses. Big thanks to the team for getting everything in on the video!

Second, they gave us concept art for armor models. This is probably the highlight for me, hands down. If you look at the armor, all three are represented by a race and it’s appropriate faction. Each armor also fits its races/factions archtype – High elfs with regals armor, Nords with barbaric armor, and so on. This leads me to believe you will find faction specific armor in ESO stereotypical of their factions roots. What do you think is the coolest looking armor set? Try being unbiased towards faction.

Behead the King!

This week Zenimax has come out with a short story written by their very own team. The story, Travails and Triumphs of a Monarch, focuses on the Breton merchant lord High King Emeric. In this dive into lore, you can look at the upbringing of Emeric, the breaking of the Siege of Wayrest, and his final ascension to the throne. I think it’s pretty obvious you won’t get spoilers from me, so go read it for yourself ya’ lazy slouch!

Pro-Tip: Emeric’s hairstyle/beard is the only choice in fantasy MMO’s. I’ve used that combination since forever.

Zenimax Interviews Blur Studios

Blur, the ever popular CGI design and development studio and AKQA the advertising agency came together in an interview to answer some questions regarding their recent Alliance trailer (Not linking the trailer. If you haven’t seen it, you’re dead to me.) If you’re interested in some in-depth questions regarding the studio and their inspiration on the ESO, go check it out.

Community Round up – It’s alive!

The Rubicon #1 – The Crossing

I consider myself modest. In no one way would I promote one of the finest podcasts on the internet hosted by myself and @Fizzle. Now advertising a near genius podcast might be morally bankrupt because I must remain impartial. Likewise, suggesting that @Fizzle is a master warlock who harvests the souls of Yangtze River dolphins and revels at the lamentations of your women would be a clear violation of my moral code. That being said, I recommend you listening to episode #1, but don’t like it. Promise?

Free Morrowind You Say?

This week on Twitter, the Elder Realm was featured by Zenimax in a contest for a Game of the Year Edition of Morrowind! If you don’t already own this game, shame on you and your family. If you are one of those people, go over to their website and tell them why YOU are the biggest Elder Scrolls Online fan. The contest is over on Sunday February the 17^th, and because of that, I’m putting out this article early just for you. See? I’m not such a bad guy after all.

Elder Scrolls Off The Record #55 – Mage Fever!

If you’ve been attempting the mage challenge or don’t even know what the mage challenge is, tune into this weeks episode of Elder Scrolls Off The Record. The hosts go over their character builds and general game-play strategy for their mage characters which could be useful for all of you melee-only people. They also spend a heavy amount of time looking at Dragonborn and their general impressions of the DLC. I haven’t picked it up myself, so for any of you who have yet to play, !warning! – they have some spoilers! (They warn you.)

Troll Scroll #13 – Espionage

The hosts of Troll Scroll attacked a few different topics this week including the ESO business model with a man down due to illness. I will say this episode was kind of frustrating because a big part of the beginning was devoted to a new MMORPG announcement that is similar to DAoC. I’ll be honest, it was in part related to ESO, but I don’t think enough to merit such a long conversation. Either way, go make up your own mind and give them a listen.

The Cogwheels of Tamriel Foundry – After Hours

Apocrypha Now!

Ha, did you see what I did there? If you are blind and didn’t notice the amazing work @Atropos did on our new site design, I will be printing the brail version of Heimskr’s High Horse and selling it on Amazon for your SOUL. Really though, there’s not much to say here. The site looks god damn fantastic. Atropos gave a little insight into his new site design:

A major objective for me over the last two months has been to hand-design a theme specifically for Tamriel Foundry that will serve the site with a stable, functional, and aesthetically pleasing platform on which to build as we approach the release of The Elder Scrolls Online

That’s right. Hand-made, not some cheap knock-off! If you’re a fan and follower of Tamriel Foundry, be proud that you’re part of the single largest and most comprehensive ESO community in the world! If you want specifics on the site changes, check them out here in a post by Atropos.

1337 – Take a Chip… and EAT IT!

This past week, we had a site breaking surge of traffic thanks to the fellas over at Zenimax. While I was at work diligently filling out my TPS reports, I noticed a Facebook post featuring our new site design from Zenimax. At that moment, I turned into Light Yagami from Death Note and put my fingers into high gear… straight to our Google Analytics account. I was JUST in time to capture this image for your viewing pleasure.

The number didn’t stop there. Don’t tell Atropos I posted this here, ok?

After Hours Club

The After Hours Club is a special section in Heimskr’s High Horse to look over the most popular, the most controversial, and the most insightful community topics of the week. This week we have three threads that are sure to satisfy your curiosity or feed the fires of internet barbarism.

1. The popular thread of the week wasn’t exactly created this week, but picked back up in popularity over this past week. The thread focuses on What Will You Do if You Became Emperor? If I was made Emperor, I would levy additional taxes to push for a Tamriel space program. Bitches love space.

1. This week’s insightful post of the week goes to @Elember for his thread on Books that Players can Create. His thread reminds me of the useful hints players in Dark Souls used to leave on the ground “Try Jumping.” Screw you if you were one of those people.

1. The infamous controversial post of the week goes to @Merix and his thread on Crafting… Universal or Limited? I think professions should be limited to 2-3 choices per character. This forces players to work together and create alts who focus in professions that synergize with their mains choices.

Round-up

I hope you enjoyed Heimskr’s High Horse. Next week already has some great information waiting to be posted, so come back, stay awhile, and listen.